Oh God, Help us, help us!

Notes from a conversation with my brother while watching the latest Bush press conference on CSPAN

Josh: This is like a kid trying to speak adult.
Zev: This is like an infant trying to speak Chinese.
Josh: This is like a dog sitting in the driver’s seat, trying to drive a car.
Zev: This is like a dog sitting at the kitchen table, trying to sail a boat.
Josh: (pause) How does a dog at a kitchen table sail a boat?
Zev: Carefully.